I'm sorry.

The only reason I abandoned this blog is because my computer broke, and it is difficult to edit on my phone. Also, typing on my phone is difficult.

I don't want to title it.

Greetings, readers, followers, people who are interested in me!  It's been about 6 weeks. I just kept forgetting to update. For real.
So, today is January 30th, which means I have almost successfully survived the first month of the year. I won't know until 11:59PM tomorrow.  Ha. That was funny, laugh.
Christmas happened. Work happened. It was all very uppity, this holiday season. My brother was home for about 10 days, and that was nice.
In continuation from the last post, I will be attending university in the spring semester of this year, which starts on Monday. Yay. So thrilled. Also, I was told that Tommy Hilfiger would be keeping me permanently.  I accepted this position, gratefully.

Recently, I've been kind of sad. Sad because of books, sad because of friends, sad because of my lack of a relationship and the direction it is heading. Sad because my family wants to move to Colorado and I refuse to.  It's all a mess, so I read and go to work to get my mind off of things.

I don't really have much to say, so, I'm going to go read more. Y'all take care. Otter out. 

Holiday season, and other stuff.

It's been almost a month, folks, I am sorry for that.  If any of you actually read this.
SO, in the past almost month, these are the things that have happened.  (This will be in list form) (It may be long)
1. Doctor Who 50th. I sobbed.
2. I witnessed drunk people for the first time. Not too fun. Sorry.
3. I went into a 5 day depression/slum and didn't get my mood picked up again until Thanksgiving.
4. I was accepted into a university. whether I go there or not is up to me and not you, and I will know and you won't, and only like 3 people know if I'm attending or not. and none of them are my best friends.
5. I went out to eat for my birthday with 2 great friends, and we went to the mall and had fun.
6. Thanksgiving was cool, but my brother wasn't around, so it was a little sad.
7. I worked a 12 hour shift on my birthday, which happened to fall on black friday this year.
8. I turned 20.
9. I went to see Frozen on my birthday with a good friend. And then we snuck in to see Catching Fire.
10. My brother came home.
11. Then he left again.
12. My neighbor killed his girlfriend and the SWAT team was in front of my house for 10 hours, and I couldn't go to work.
13. I worked 6 days in a row and it was CRAZY.
14. One of my old managers walked into my store, and told me she was proud of me for standing up for myself to my manager at Old Navy.
15. I got into a car accident. I am okay. no worries.
16. New love interest.
17. That's it.

Okay, have a nice day. Love you, bye. Otter, out.

Outlines

Alright. So, it's been a while.
Today, I feel like a real blogger. I am sitting in a cafe, and I ordered some food, and I ate it, and now I'm blogging.  It's at the library though, the cafe is.
And surely, you're wondering why I'm at the library, actually, you probably aren't, but I'll share anyways.
Our internet only get 30GB a month, and well, I decided to watch all of John Green's Mental Floss videos in a week, and used up MOST of our gigs. So, I'm here. Using this internet to blog. Last night I made a list of things I would be blogging about, an outline, if you may. Hence the title of this entry, Outlines. 
So, here we are. Five topics.
Topic One. How do you know if you actually genuinely like a person, like... like like a person. Because I'm in the middle of 2 people. The first, A nice boy I've known for about 3 years. But, 33.34% of the time I want to beat the shit out of him, 33.33% of the time I want to do cute relationship-y stuff with him, and 33.33% of the time, I want to have an intellectual conversation with him.  It's tricky with him.  But this other guy, I just started working with him. He's a nice boy, flirty, funny, nice, and laughs at my jokes, and from what it seems, puts up with my awkward. Sounds like a keeper to me, but I barely know this boy. So that's tricky too. He could be gay, or have a girl friend, or he could be flirty with every girl. But I don't know, because I just met him.
Topic Two. 
I was watching Doctor Who last night. Fun time travel show. and I realized something. Something absolutely terrifying. You can't tell the future. Okay. Now, everyone knows this, but here's the thing. You can have a rough outline of what you're going to do tomorrow, but ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING could happen tomorrow, something absolutely life changing could happen. And you wouldn't know it until it happens. Other than that rough outline, your life is completely up in the air, and that terrifies me.
Topic Three. 
Doctor Who. Ugh. I used to really like the 10th doctor. Like, I used to LOVE him. Now, I really love the 11th Doctor. I LOVE him. But recently, I watched the 8th Doctor's movie, and I love him too, he was so underrated. and I feel like a terrible person for shunning him for only having an hour of on screen time. I want them to write more for him. I want him to have a season. I want to know more about him. I have this whole theory with BBC in the back of my mind, but I don't really feel like putting it on the internet, but in general, I believe that BBC didn't plan on continuing after 7, but when America made a movie starring Mcgann, they decided to continue with it, and they had this whole plan with the missing Doctor, and all of that stuff. Honest, that's what I think. There's more to it, but it's complex, and too much to type. As it is, this is the longest topic thus far.
Topic Four. 
Work. I got a new job at Tommy Hilfiger. I like it. a lot. People are nice. Clothes are nice. I get paid every week.
Topic Five. 
There wasn't a topic five. But I didn't realize it. So I'll make one. There's this girl, trying to video chat her friend or someone, and the connection isn't working, so the only this she is saying is "Hello? Hello? Hello, why can't I see you?" Over and over and over again. And you'd think that is the connection wasn't working, she would just stop and maybe use her telephone to call her friend, but no, she has to video chat. and I hate to be that person, but it's really kind of annoying and she should just stop.

Okay. That's it for today, I hope you are all having a lovely, wonderful, fantastic day. Otter out! 

*Random frustrated noises*

Hello all.  It's been quite a while since I updated. A few weeks I think. Well, here we go.

About two weeks ago, I got a job at Tommy Hilfiger. I am happy about that, and I think it will go well. It is only temporary, but I think it will be good. The people that I've met so far that work there seem really nice, and I'm glad I got a job there. From the minute I walked in the door to drop off my application, they seemed really interested in me. And  I'm proud of that.

Other than that, I've been feeling pretty down lately.  I won't even lie. I'm really down lately. And a lot of weird things have been going through my mind. So, before I talk about me being down, I'll talk about the weird thoughts that I have often.

1) When people die, where do their minds go? Do their minds just stop thinking? Are there ghosts? Do their minds just float around in the air, and when we get random thoughts, it's because their minds went through our head? Like, what even happens, I can't imagine a mind just stopping.

2) Does every person taste the same food in the same ways, and we just have different opinions on it? OR do foods taste different to most people, but similar foods taste similar? Like bubble gum, it tastes different to most people, but it still tastes like a mix of vanilla and banana, and so, therefore, everything tastes different, but like things still have similar tastes? Do you know what I mean? Does that EVEN make sense?

3) The same this with tastes as colors. Does everyone see pink as pink? Perhaps what I see as pink is someone else's green.
That was much easier to explain.

Okay. That's about it.

Next. Ugh, I never actually wanted to actually get to this.  I'm feeling down. I don't know why, but I am. I just am. Kay? And do you know what is keeping my mental stability? Harry Potter. HARRY POTTER IS. And I'm mad because I want to give up on a guy. And my dog is sick. And I miss my brother. And I want to go to school.

And I sobbed last night. And I just sobbed and sobbed and sobbed.

That's that. I'll talk to you all later. Otter out. 

Memories

Hello all. Today's entry will have a number of topics.  First there will be a play I went to recently, next Germany, then my trip to my grandparent's house today, and finally, what I did tonight. Let's begin.

Recently, I went to see a Shakespeare play with a friend at her school. It was called (as I remember it), As You Like It.  This was my first Shakespeare play that I've ever seen, and to be honest, I thought I would be asleep during it. As it appears, it was very comedic and hilarious.  Turns out, people back in the 17th century were just as quirky as we are today. I'd go see it again, if I had the chance.

Germany. OH GERMANY. If I don't get into UW - Parkside, I will be going to Germany with my brother to live there for a year or so. If I do get into UW - Parkside, I will be going to live with my brother for a year or so come June. Either way, I'm going to live in Germany for a year or so. Maybe meet a nice European boy and marry him. Maybe become a bartender. I don't know yet, but I will be going to Germany. And I can't wait.

Grandma and Grandpa. I went to visit them today with my mom and dad.  Grandpa just celebrated his 80th birthday, and he's still really weird. I realized just how much I have in common with my grandparents. They watch one of my favorite TV shows, just like me and my dad. They are silly, and goofy, and I never realized how much they actually love me and care for me until I'd have to say this past year. Because they really truly do love me and my brother, and I never realized it. I am grateful to have them in my life.

Tonight, I went through the box of letters and cards that I have. I have things in there that are as old as 6 years old, from my 14th birthday. From middle school graduation.  I went through it, because it was getting very packed and very unorganized.  I got rid of envelopes that I didn't need anymore, or letters of people that are no longer in my life because we simply haven't talked in years, and we will never talk again.  There weren't a lot of those letters. While I was doing this, the title screen for the movie "One Day" was playing. The music was very sentimental, and I was absolutely sobbing, just thinking about how much these people care for me, to have taken the time out of their day to write me a letter. To show their appreciation and love. To compliment me. To make me feel special. And I was sobbing.  My grandpa wrote to me every 2 weeks while I was in college. There are friends that I have that sent me a letter every year for my birthday. Friends who hand made cards for me. Or drew me a pretty picture. Or just sent me something to make my day. And I was sobbing. Feeling so appreciated.

That's all for tonight. Otter out. 

Update of some sort.

Hey guys! It's been a while, oh yes it has.
Well, in the past almost 2 weeks or so.... I got a nice hair cut, it's short.  I went to Wisconsin Rapids with a nice friend, and also to Madison with said friend. It was a cold trip and I only had sweaters and blankets and body heat to keep me warm.

I'll talk about my trip.
So I went to Madison to pick up my friend Mitch so we could go to Rapids to see the play. It was fine, the trip up, he played pokemon, I complained about being cold or speeding.  We got about 3 minutes from his house and he says to me “Do you want cheese on your burger?"
We decided dinner at his place would suffice. He didn't tell me what was being planned for dinner. He also doesn't know that I don't eat beef.  I wanted to cry. So I just said “sure, I'll take cheese" in a very uneasy tone which he didn't pick up and when we got there, I ate the sandwich. 
We left about 15 minutes later to see the show and visited with lovely people and watched the show. 
I got succumbed into helping clean up after the show once again. We left. And we froze our asses off in my house.
There was an 8 am wake up call. I did some ‘chores'... picked apples, put on the tea, cleaned the dishes.  Mitch got ready.  We left shortly after.  I almost hit a deer on the way back. That was my real wake up call.
When we got back to Madison, I took a 2 hour nap, I called my grandma, and we watched YouTube videos.  Then it was time to go home.  I called my cousin when I reached Milwaukee.  We talked for an hour. 
I'm not going to lie, it felt good to be home. It was a fantastic weekend, but my own bed. And pokemon. And my dogs.

I'll post more tomorrow, because there's more to tell about what's happened since the last update. Until then, Otter out!